Absolution
by ladyasile
Summary: Yaoi. JuubeixKazuki. It something that causes ache and bliss; something that liberates and traps; something that two men have sought and found.


**Absolution**

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A/N: A birthday gift to MintyFlake! Happy (belated) birthday, dear! Sadly, I wasn't able to write you what you wanted. However, I wrote you this story and I hope you like it. I'd give you a list of reasons, but nothing is an excuse for not giving you what you had asked for. I apologize.

Disclaimer: I don't own Get Backers!

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"_I fought it. No… I gave into it, without a second thought. This attraction shattered everything I had believed in. For the first time, I felt like an outsider in my own body, mind, heart, and spirit. The entire experience was liberating yet terrifying. To relinquish all that I had learned and honored in one ephemeral, fairylike moment felt like nothing to me. All that I wished for was to be with him. To feel his soul bond with mine in such a manner that must be an atrocity to some, but a piece of heaven to others."_

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Pulling away from his lover, Kazuki realized one thing that he hadn't before. After his lover laid him onto the seat, he knew he had been right. Tonight things were going to change. "Are we… Juubei…" In all honesty, Kazuki had no idea what to do. When the concept of sex had first come into his mind, he had envisioned soft breasts, a different entrance in the lower body area, and himself on top. Now he had a strong chest to face, a hard cock, and someone on top of him.

There was a gentle smile on his lover's face. "Kazuki, I will not cause you pain. I vow it. It is an honor to be your first, and I will see to it that it is a memory you will cherish," he said, voice low and seductive yet compassionate enough to arouse and comfort him.

Although he nodded, he couldn't bring himself to voice out any of the other concerns he had. Gulping, he reached up for Juubei. Before their lips connected once more, Kazuki's mind reminded him of where they were. "Wait, Juubei!" His lover halted and frowned. "Am I really going to lose my virginity in a car? And… is it even yours? Why are there girl accessories here?" Pausing long enough to look around the car, but not enough to allow Juubei to answer, he continued his tirade of questions. "You're not a… Are you? Or maybe you're planning on dressing me up as a girl… Juubei, I'm not really into--"

"Kazuki!" The loud outburst had caught his attention and quieted him down. "We do not have to do this if you do not feel ready. I can wait." Juubei pulled him up and brought him into his arms. "I will not force you to do this. I love you, Kazuki." It seemed that Juubei knew what had been bothering him. Although part of him still wished to know if the car they were in was indeed Juubei's car. Before he could ask, his lover answered his question. "You are right. This is not my car. A friend lent it to me, and I am certain she would not mind if we… As long as I return it to her clean, there is no problem."

Even though he knew Juubei was serious, he could not help but laugh.

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"_The moment that you realize that your heart has been pierced… What do you think of? My first thoughts were of him. It was as if I had planned my future with him in the blink of an eye. I pictured us being together, even in our deathbed. Death became the least of my worries after that moment. My first worry was about him. Just how was I to get with someone like him?"_

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They caressed each other as they swayed in harmony. Their moans and panting were like music in his ears. Feeling Juubei push inside him, fondling his cock and balls, he felt himself lose the last of his concerns. There would be time to worry about the consequences later. Right then and there, all he had to think about was how to pleasure Juubei and how to show him that he loved him back.

Feeling himself close to an orgasm, he pulled Juubei toward him. They shared a brief gaze of the eyes before kissing. Just as they swayed, their tongues clashed. The damp, passion-filled sensation from their kiss sent Kazuki over his head. With a short cry of his lovers name, he came.

Before Juubei came, he grunted out, "Kazuki… Love you… Always!"

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"_When my eyes were gifted with the sight of your smile, I knew that for the rest of my life I would never find someone else. Never. No one like you would ever be bestowed to me. For several weeks I felt myself withering without your presence there. I must admit, it terrified me. Why? Because feeling that particular emotion meant that I no longer was just a man. It was a sign that I now was a man in love. And with love there are several uncertainties. Out of all of them, I was above all frightened of one."_

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The clock's ticking had resumed. It had brought him back into the world that he wished to escape from. In front of him stood one of the several people who made it impossible to run away. Although it had been a mistake of his that had landed him in the dull room, it still didn't change the fact that he wanted to be liberated from the strings that held him down.

"I see you have your head in the clouds. Kazuki Fuuchoin, have you at all listened to anything that I have said?" Needless to say, his father's voice rose into what he could just describe as a roar. With his father standing so close to him, it felt like standing in front of a god. It wasn't that his father was at all loving, caring, or even encouraging, but rather that he had immense strength and ties to the community that would no doubt do his bidding in a heartbeat. When he had been younger, he had had a great deal of admiration for him. As he grew, Kazuki began to notice the flaws that now made it unfeasible to idolize him.

Bowing his head, he answered, "Yes… Father." It wasn't necessary for him to raise his head to know that his father was smirking. 'Perhaps he thinks that I'm submitting to him,' he thought with cynical smile on his lips.

"You aren't to see him anymore. Kazuki, you carry the proud name of our clan. To go off with such filth is to tarnish our good name and your family! Surely I don't need to stress how vital it is that no one sees you with him! Men should not lie with men, it is an abomination!" Despite the several times his father had repeated the same thing, tears still stung his eyes. Although he tried his best to hold them back, he knew that it was just holding back the inevitable. Soon he would shed them all and his father would smile, knowing that he had caused him pain.

Kazuki bit his lip, giving himself enough time to make sure that his voice would not sound strained. "I understand, Father. Clearly I have brought shame and should be punished." Looking up, he saw his father nod at him before reaching over and holding his chin. Unable to release himself, he looked into the man's eyes.

"I see." His father's eyes narrowed before pulling himself upward. Just as Kazuki was about to set his gaze elsewhere, his father's icy and jagged hand made contacted with his cheek. The force caused him to bite down on his tongue as well. After the shock had passed, he became aware of the metal-like taste in his mouth. "You've given me the same words over and over again, Kazuki. Do not take me for a fool! I'll make certain that this time, you learn the lesson that you refuse to comprehend!" Walking towards him, his father wore a sadistic smirk. "Tell me, Kazuki, how far have you gone with him?"

After wiping away the blood with sleeve, he found no other form of stalling. Swallowing, he lifted his head up high and answered. "I've given him my purity as well as my love." Another slap sent him to the floor, at his father's feet.

"How could you disgrace us like that? I assume that the rumors of you tossing your virginity to him in a car are true, Kazuki?" There was no need for him to answer, truth or lie. Any response he could give would not deter his father from going through what he had planned.

Groaning as he pushed himself upwards, Kazuki looked at his father's face. The moment he did, he regretted it. The front of his father's shoe made contact with stomach. The hit forced him some feet away from his father, all of which he was grateful for. Not waiting to be beaten some more, Kazuki fled the room. There was far more that his father had already planned, that much was obvious from the look in his eyes.

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"_There was something about you that attracted me. It was not how you reacted towards me, but rather the way you held yourself so composed. Afterwards, I knew that you had presented a challenge to me. Never in my entire life had I been as eager to lose a challenge was I did at that moment. The wintry barriers that had prevented me from exploring what the world in general kept hidden had kept me so secure that the possibility of two men falling in love seemed outlandish. You, however, were adamant about us being together. That… It helped me overcome any guilt I had."_

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"No, Kazuki… This is something I cannot allow you to do!"

He wasn't able to listen to more. "Juubei," he whispered as he placed his lips on Juubei's. It didn't take long before Juubei began to kiss him back, sealing both of their decision and fates. "We have to acknowledge it. There is no place where we will not be persecuted for our love. As much as it may hurt, we have to know that. This world is loving, but the people in it aren't always accepting or understanding." With what he hoped was a bright smile, he leaned in for another kiss. "To want to be happy is something we have a right to. And I don't intend on sulking for the rest of my days."

Juubei grasped his hands and held them close to his heart. "Very well, Kazuki. My one treasure in this world is you, and I do not intend to lose that." After placing another kiss on his lips, Juubei smiled at him. "We should go now… To wherever our path leads us to."

With a nod, Kazuki embraced his lover. "We'll probably need help. Getting out of here will not be an easy task."

"My friend will help us. She tends to be very resourceful."

Kazuki giggled. "MintyFlake? So, she's not angry with you about her car? Never mind, I'd rather not ruin the moment we're having."

They held hands as they walked off into the protective shadows and the cloak that the night offered them. As they took their final steps out of their old lives, Kazuki nor Juubei spared the scene behind them a final glance or farewell.

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"_There is not a doubt in my mind about what would have happened if we had remained where we had been before. However, it is not a thought I care to recall much. All I know is that love was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Although it came with a price that I could not pay off all at once, in the end, it gave me much more than anything in my life. In the end, it was not my love for a man that proved to be the more challenging. No, it was proving to myself that I was worth the man I had fallen for."_

"_He freed me. When I only knew of marriage, he came in and showed me love. The union of a man and a woman is not sacred unless love is involved, just like any other types of unions. Giving myself to him made me understand something I never had before. That love is not something that goes away or that is wrong. Love is always right and at times it never goes away. It can be hidden, but never extinguished. Now, I know I would do anything for him… In life and in death, because we are not held by strings. The strings connect us, and they cannot be severed, ever."_

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End.


End file.
